<h1>About Discounts Ahoy</h1> <p>Arrgh! So ye wish to know the epically outrageous, outlandish tale o' how Discounts Ahoy came te be, do ye? So be it, but be warned landlubber, tales o' such severity need to respected te the utmost, so any mind-sickness that overtakes ye from the sheer madness of the tale be not our responsibility!</p> <p>Our story begins in the year 1578, when the Lord Pirate <a href="http://www.facebook.com/discountsahoy">John Berrinson</a> raided the coffers of an ancient tomb in the Irish isles. Upon stealing everything from the gold encrusted weaponry o' the Celts who came before him to the dried, ancient scraps o' meat, Berrinson was woe to behold a terrible sight, a banshee demon from the nether-realm appeared as he crossed the threshold into daylight.</p> <p>Pain wracked his body as the scream o' the banshee echoed out o' the chamber and into the world beyond. As John crumpled to the ground in agony the banshee approached and whispered into his ear, "You shall be punished for your wicked crimes with life everlasting." With that, the banshee vanished.</p> <p>Days and months turned into years and decades, and over time John Berrinson, Lord Pirate of the 16th century passed through time as a lonely immortal, doomed to lose everyone he held dear. After over 430 years spent in near madness traveling the globe he finally came up with an idea - a coupon site dedicated to savings.</p> <p>And with that ridiculously unrelated idea as it relates to the rest o' the narrative, Discounts Ahoy was born!</p>